| ERROR ANALYSIS RUBRIC FOR SUMMER INTERNS OF MODLINGUA 2018 |
| Version 1 - Draft | Version 2 - Corrected | Comment Types of Errors |
| The world, its culture and languages have been my passion since I was little. Growing up as the only kid who speaks English in a small village in Indonesia which only either Javanese is spoken at home and Bahasa Indonesia at school, permits to see the world and shape my mind and thought because of the constant exposure of different languages while I grew up. Thus, my passion is not just an interest or choice, but more like it has been there with me. As I grow up, I picked up another language, French, Portuguese, and recently Hungarian, that I was amazed I can speak it in a quite little time since I started studying it. Plus, now I’m living in Delhi, hence I am exposed to Hindi daily. | The world, its culture, and languages have been my passion since I was little. Growing up as the only kid who speaks English in a small village in Indonesia which only either Javanese is spoken at home or Bahasa Indonesia at school, permits me to see the world and shapes my present mind and thought because of the constant exposure of different languages while I grew up. Thus, my passion is not just an interest or choice, but it has been there with me. As I grow up, I picked up another language, French, Portuguese, and recently Hungarian, in which I was amazed that I can speak it in a quite little time since I started studying it. Plus, now I am living in Delhi, hence I am exposed to Hindi daily. | Addition of a comma before "languages". Changing "and" into "or". Addition of "me" after "permits". Changing "shape" into "shapes". Addition of "present" before "mind and thought". Omission of "more like". Changing "that" into "in which". Addition of "that" after "amazed". |
| I am currently sitting in a BA (Hons.) in French, in Delhi University under a scholarship that I won by the Indian Government, I was also granted another scholarship from Serbian Government to study in Serbia for another BA but I decided to study here because of the cultural diversity of India. I also just completed a certificate course in Hungarian with very high marks under the teaching of Dr. Koves Margit. Previously, I studied International Relation in Indonesia while picking up French by myself. Here, I study multiple languages at a time, and it is such a joy for me. Living in another country gives me a vast opportunity to develop myself, I am now holding a position as the President of Indonesian Students’ Association in Delhi and the Designing Team of Indonesian Students’ Association in India. We organize a lot of cultural activities in JNU and in cooperation with Indonesian Embassy in Delhi. At the same time, I am an active union member of International Students’ House of Delhi University where I live now. | I am currently sitting in a BA (Hons.) in French, in Delhi University under a scholarship that I won by the Indian Government, I was also granted another scholarship from Serbian Government to study in Serbia for another BA but I decided to study here because of the cultural diversity of India. I also just completed a certificate course in Hungarian with very high marks under the teaching of Dr. Köves Margit. Previously, I studied BA in International Relation in Indonesia while picking up French by myself. Here, I study multiple languages at a time, and it is such a joy for me. Living in another country gives me a vast opportunity to develop myself, I am now holding a position as the President of Indonesian Students’ Association in Delhi and the Graphic Designing Team of Indonesian Students’ Association in India. We organize a lot of cultural activities in JNU and in cooperation with Indonesian Embassy in Delhi. At the same time, I am an active union member of International Students’ House of Delhi University where I live now. | Ortograph editing in "Koves" into "Köves". Editing in "BA in International Relation". Addition in "Graphic Designing Team". |
| My hobbies include reading, writing, sharing with others, and researching. I love writing an academic paper and recently I won the third prize of Korosi Csoma Sandor Competition held by Balassi Institute of Hungary with my essay regarding the Treaty of Trianon and the impact to Hungarian literature and society. | My hobbies include reading, writing, sharing with others, and researching. I love writing an academic paper and recently I won the third prize of Körösi Csoma Sandor Competition held by Balassi Institute of Hungary with my essay regarding the Treaty of Trianon and the impact to Hungarian literature and society. | Ortograph editing in "Korosi" into "Körösi". |
| After my bachelor, I plan to move to Hungary to pursue a master degree in a Hungarian University in Language and Culture taught in Hungarian. This offers a huge opportunity to immerse myself in Hungarian and opens so many doors for me to develop myself and apply my knowledge on languages and things about them to my daily life, my works, and my future, especially for my home country and its society but also for people around me no matter what country I am residing. I would like to be an academic researcher and a university lecturer in language, linguistics, and literature field as it aligns with my passion. | After my bachelor, I plan to move to Hungary to pursue a master degree in a Hungarian University in Language and Culture taught in Hungarian. This offers a huge opportunity to immerse myself in Hungarian and opens various doors for me to develop myself and apply my knowledge on languages and things about them to my daily life, my works, and my future, especially for my home country and its society but also for people around me no matter what country I am residing. I would like to be an academic researcher and a university lecturer in language, linguistics, and literature field as it aligns with my passion. | Changing "so many" into "various". |
| Being a holder of scholarship taught me how to be independent of a young age financially and mentally, hence I am not afraid to try the new challenge for the future, like studying far away from home in Europe. I can see myself being happy dealing with stuff in this field. | Being a holder of scholarship taught me how to be independent in a young age, financially and mentally, hence I am not afraid to try new challenges for the future, like studying far away from home in Europe. I can see myself being happy dealing with stuff in this field. | Changing "of" into "in". Addition of a comma after "age". Omission of "the". Addition plural into "challenge". |
| With all the skills and experiences around language, research, and writing, I believe I will be a great addition to the intern team in Modlingua. | With all the skills and experiences around language, research, and writing, I believe I will be a great addition to the intern team in Modlingua 2018. | Addition more info into "Modlingua". |
| Error Analysis Total Number of Source Text: 545 Total Number of Target Text: 549 |
|
| Errors related to articles | 0 |
| Errors related to punctuation, symbols, signs, spaces | 2 |
| Omissions | 2 |
| Spelling errors | 0 |
| Choice of words | 3 |
| Factual errors | 0 |
| Choice of words and overall consistency of those words | 0 |
| An eye for details | Some edit to ease the reading. |
| Page layout and overall presentation | Present |
| Profile Photo Quality | Profile picture is correct at 250x 250 pixel size. |
| Additional comments if any | Apart from above errors, lots of improvement in the sentence structure was done in order to bring more clarity and coherence. |
| Time taken to correct 545 words: | 10 Minutes |
| Time taken to prepare this evaluation report: | 20 Minutes |
